Weirdest Lyrics Ever: The Pina Colada Song

May 23, 2016

You know how songs come on the radio while driving and we barely pay attention to their lyrics?

This was one of those rare moments my mind decided to listen to what the song was saying.

Holy shit.
What a weird fucking song.

The story is about a bored married dude.

He’s so tired of his “old lady”, that while she’s sleeping next to him, he scans the personals in a newspaper. One of those ads catches his eyes and he’s hooked.

She writes:
Do you like pina coladas?
Do you like getting caught in the rain?
Are you not into yoga? Do you have half a brain?

So, he writes back.
Yes, I 100% agree with what you said.
I also don’t like health food, and prefer champagne.
You sound so awesome, I’ve got to meet you right away.
How about tomorrow noon, at a bar called O’Malley’s?
We can plan our escape together.

So, this long time married dude, behind his wife’s back, goes to this bar to meet a random woman, on a blind date. No clue what she looks like.

He sits there waiting in high hopes.
And the woman comes thru.

He recognizes her right away.

….

IT’S HIS OWN FUCKING WIFE!!

They laugh at the situation.
Get to know each other once again.

I guess he had no idea she likes pina coladas and getting caught in the rain. Nor that she hates yoga and all that other shit she wrote. And vice versa.

Seems they were both pretending to be someone they weren’t all this time.

What?!

PS: It’s a catchy song.