How to deposit Positive Energy into our Universal Bank Account

July 3, 2014

TL;DR: If you’re faced with a tough road ahead, no turning back, and in need of some emergency positive juices: hand out some compliments, generous tips, and especially boxes of chocolates to strangers. And dare the universe to be bad to you. Impossible.

I was panicking.

I had just bought a plane ticket to Brazil.
Put down deposit money for a psychedelic retreat.
And now there was no turning back.

But I had never travelled out of the country by myself. Can’t speak Portuguese. Not a big fan of meeting new people. Not a fan of sleeping away from my bed.

And to top if off, I purposely avoided planes for many years because it’s torture. Coach seats feel like a giraffe stuffed into a sardine can.

Not going also was not an option.
My current life was even worse.

Overweight. Miserable. Working a job I hated.
My garage floor was filled with TONS of mcdonalds wrappers.
I just didn’t care.

My normal routine:
Skip breakfast. Rush hour. Coffee. Work. Coffee.
Skip lunch. Coffee. Work. Rush Hour.
Dinner binge. Food coma. Sleep.

Rinse. Repeat. For six years.

So I have to fly outta here.
And I’m panicking.
What now?

I decided to hijack positive energy.
Force the universe to be nice to me.

I went to Walgreens & bought the most expensive boxes of chocolate.
Three of them.
And decided to hand them out to three random strangers I meet during the trip.

First person I met that day was my cabbie.
Friendly greek guy.
Like overly friendly.
We talked about his kids, his life, my life and other positive things.
His warm personality set the right tone for the day.

I didn’t expect to part with a box of chocolate this fast.
At the airport, I gave him compliments.
Tipped well.
And lastly handed him a box of chocolate.
His eyes lit up. Said his daughter loves chocolates.
Have a great trip.

I walk into the airport and am confused.
I’ve never solo traveled international before.
And I was doing the thing where you go to a kiosk to print tickets.

I can either go left or right.
Left side has domestic kiosks.
Right for international.

My flight was from
Chicago O’hare to Miami International.
From there to Sao Paolo, Brazil.
Then to Itacare.

So I went to the domestic kiosk.
After pressing many buttons, I get an error message.
The lady working behind the counter comes over.

Oh sir, you have to go to international kiosk.


She was also overly nice. Said this is a common mistake.
Not to worry. Walked me over to international kiosk.
And slid my passport into the thingie.
Because I couldn’t figure out how to do it.

A popup alert.
Upgrade to first class for a super low price.
I think +$20? +50? Whatever it was, it was really low.
To go from Chicago to Miami.

I ask the lady, should I do it??
Wanted someone to upsell me.

She looked at my tickets.
Well, it looks like you have a long day ahead of you.
You should treat yourself.


I didn’t give her chocolates. Was in a rush.
But lavishly gave compliments, made her blush as much as possible.

Thanks for saving my life Ms.
No problem sir, my pleasure.

Added more bonus points in my positivity bank.
My long legs traveled in style to Miami.

At Miami International, I had a couple of hours to kill.
I immediately found my connecting flight & sat there.

Music blasting in my headphones.
Half hour goes by.
One hour.
Two hours.
The plane is about to board.

I get this odd gut feeling.
Am I at the right gate?

Of course I am.
Wait, am I?
Ah stop worrying.
No seriously, am I in the right place?
Inner turmoil.

I walk up to the board and made sure it said Sao Paolo, Brazil.
It is. Ok, phew.

Wait, Sao Paolo?
Is that where I’m going?
I look at my ticket.
I’m at the wrong gate.


Just so happens both planes leave around the same time.
But the Salvador gate was all the way at the other end of the airport.

Sweat dripping, I start walking fast.
Luckily that gate was not boarding yet.
There was another 30minute wait.

Finally, the lady behind the gate calls for section one to board.
Of course I’m the last section.
And of course none of the Brazilians care which section is called.
Everyone lines up immediately.
Just like how us Indians roll.
Ethnic people don’t care about boarding rules.

I’m the last person on the plane.
And have the last seat in the last row.

Luckily I have aisle seat.
One Brazilian lady sitting by the window.
Eyeing me up and down.
Silent when I said hello.
Middle seat empty, for now.

I had to find a place to put my backpack.
Every single overhead compartment was filled with luggage.
Not even space for a piece of paper.
I had forgotten how international flights are.

Now sweat is pouring off my face.
I look at the hot flight attendants, hoping to make eye contact.
Nope. No help.
They’re speaking Portugese and doing whatever it is they do before flight takes off.

Oceans of sweat.
I’d rather be dead twice than put the backpack under my feet during this long flight.
And now the backpack won’t fit.
Brazilian lady eyeing me up and down some more.

Luckily, I had used packing cubes for the first time.
Three packing cubes, to store all my clothes.

I unpack my backpack.
Pull out the three packing cubes.
And stuff them under my seat. And under my feet.
This is not supposed to happen, I told myself.
I gave chocolates to the god damn cabbie!
And was nice to the airport lady.

The entire flight is packed.
Every seat has a human body.
Every inch of space has luggage.
All except one.
The middle seat between me & the Brazilian lady.

I immediately pull down the tray.
Put my elbows there for support.
And secretly started praying.

For the love of God. For the love of chocolates & compliments.
Please let whoever is supposed to sit here miss his flight.
Let him find another one.

I kept praying over and over.
And looking down the aisle to see if anyone was hurrying back here.
I couldn’t tell.
So many people fluttering around.

Come on pilot. Start flying. What the hell are you waiting for.
Let’s go.

I don’t know how many minutes passed.
But eventually I felt the wheels of the plane move.
Then it stopped.
Then it moved again.
Go dude, just go. Fuck that other guy. He’ll be fine.

Plane took off.
Middle seat is empty.
I turned from atheist to evangelical god lover.
Halleluja! Amen! And whatever else we’re supposed to say.

Put some of the luggage there.
Stretched my feet as best I can.

Brazilian lady looked at me and broke her silence.
You are a lucky man, she said.
Oh you speak English!

Flight wasn’t luxury by any means.
But it could have been worse had the middle seat been taken.

The second box of chocolates went to the brazilian cabbie who picked me up at the Itacare airport.

He didn’t speak english. But I hope the chocolates were good. Maybe he gave em to his kids. I was worried my walgreens chocolates may be terrible compared to their brazilian ones? Who knows.

And 3rd box + all my brazilian money to the ladies working at the resort.
They had to clean our dorm rooms, bathrooms, our ayahuasca puke buckets & cook us meals.
The least I could do.

A lot of random things went my way during that trip. A LOT.
Strangers were nice. Things flowed smoothly. I was safe. Felt great.
Intuition was strong. Mood was high.
I think it had to do my intention of spreading as much positivity as I could.
Even if for selfish reasons.

Sometimes I forget that we can hijack positive energy.
In 2013, I went on a chocolate giving spree.

For the nice ladies working at my dentists office.
They are always super kind to me. And that day, it looked like they could use a pick me up. So two boxes of chocolate dipped strawberries, same day delivery, edible arrangements.

One box mailed to a lawyer who sent me a threatening letter to pay rent for a retail property.

The letter gave my parents reason to cuss me out for my past business mistakes. That’s another long story.

But it turned out the lawyer made the mistake.
I was polite to her. And asked if she would be kind enough to write me an email saying it was their mistake, so that I could show it to my parents, and shove it down their (I mean politely share it with them to soothe their fears).

Normally lawyers are hesitant to put anything into writing. But she did. And I printed that email out and gave a copy to each parent. And told them to never bug me about that topic again. Done.

So in return, I sent a same-day edible arrangements to her office.
She was shocked. And sent me a super nice handwritten card praising humanity’s kindness.
I was grateful to her but I was kind to her for selfish reasons.
I needed more positive energy deposits in my universal bank account.

And another chocolate box went to a girl working at Jiffy Lube.
She happened to be super hot.

But I didn’t know that at first. There was a one last box of chocolate sitting in my car and I didn’t know who to give it to. Might as well hand it out to people working at Jiffy Lube.

With chocolate in hand, I thought it’d be a dude working there.
Once I saw a hot girl working behind the counter, I felt like she’d be wondering if I was hitting on her. Or what would all the other people in there think?
It worked out fine.

Anyways, I haven’t handed out chocolates since last year.
I’ve been feeling kinda down the past few days.
Few weeks.
Few months.
And wondering what I need to do to get the juices flowing again.
Maybe I need to deposit more positive energy into my universal bank?